You Might be a Preacher If . . .
you've ever received a gift certificate from U-Haul.
you've ever waded in a creek wearing a necktie.
you find negotiating with terrorists easier than with the church organist.
you've ever wanted to give the soundman a little feedback of your own.
you're leading the church into the 21st century but you don't know what you're preaching on Sunday.
the local undertaker brings you a ham and a calendar every year.
you wish people would stop honking and start tithing if they really love Jesus.
Source: Unknown
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To the world you might be one person, but to one
person you might just be the world.
Going to church does not make you a Christian anymore than going to McDonald's makes you a
hamburger.
Real friends are those who, when you feel you've
made a fool of yourself, don't feel you've done a permanent job.
A coincidence is when God performs a miracle, and
decides to remain anonymous.
Zingers With Zip
Little wits of wisdom and fun to be used in newsletters, sermons, bulletins, church signs, or any way you see fit.
Whoever gossips to you will gossip of you.
--Spanish proverb
People gather bundles of sticks to build bridges
they never cross.
Life is 10% of what happens to you, and 90% of how
you respond to it."
We are not human beings having a spiritual
experience, we are spiritual beings having a human
experience.
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live
long enough to make them all yourself.